Am I 300 pounds or is it hot in here?

OK, I didn't write anything yesterday and this post is kind of late and the post on Tuesday was kind of uninspired. What do you want from me, people? I'm not a machine, nor, apparently am I much of a professional. But it's hot and humid, I can't be as productive as you all in your air-conditioned offices. And I know as you read this in your cubicle you are getting great amounts of work done for the company. I am not you. I have time to waste and money to hemorage. Especially, now that I am not working. I have open mics to skip, so that I can go to parties and buy people drinks I can't afford at psuedo-hip bars in Union square. I have a life to squander and let me tell you to squander life correctly takes time--- lots and lots of time. I could be pursuing my career goals and personal goals. I've been planning a trip to Praque and Budhapest. And by planning I mean, I said to my portland buddy, you have friends in Prague let's go in September. Now, have I gone to the library to get travel books? Of course not! This wasting of my life just gets in the way of all the other stuff. For instance I'm supposed to pretend to be Princess Leigha (sp--you know Luke's sister) as an open mic comic on Sunday. I've known about this since Tuesday, have I done any preparation yet? No! I need to write menstruation jokes from another galaxie-- a galaxie far far away. How am I to know how darth vader's daughter deals with her monthly? Should I do jokes about being a single princess? "It's so tough out there the only boys to date I'm related to." Yeah, exactly. I'm under pressure and my sweat has formed waves that are crashing onto my keyboard.

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Unrelated. I'd also like to ask how is that any babies are born South of Connecticut in the months of March, April, and May. How could couples want to touch each other in this kind of summer weather? My best friend Anna was telling me how she nearly passed out last night while she was with one of her men and not the good kind of passing out.

Comments

Lucky said…
oh lady, one day i will join you soon and we can drink many bevvies in union square and be all cool like scenesters and dress like we are liberals and flaunt our raspberry berets and brooklyn lagers in the faces of unsuitable men.

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