Monday, July 13, 2009

Pinching Pennies. But Still Having fun.

Summer weather has finally arrived here in the Northeast, so get out there and have some fun. "But, Rachael I'm part of the 10% unemployed in the country. I don't have the money for summer fun."

There are plenty of free things to do in the summer. Many communities sponsor free movies in parks. Or if you're looking for something free to do this summer that's a little more adventurous but just as community oriented as free movies in the park may a suggest protesting. As many of you know Goldman Sachs, Citicorp, and Morgan Stanley have stolen the all our money. You might remember last year their oil speculation caused oil prices to spike. Those prices spiked so high you couldn't afford to take a summer vacation last year and that's when you had a job. All the while they were selling your bad debt back to you in the form of AAA bonds for your retirement plan. Then they stole our tax money.

You could go to Six Flags this summer, but if you're going to stand in lines all day you might as well stand in front of the Corporate Headquarters to a MegaBank and block the entrance. It costs nothing to stand on a sidewalk while it costs $45 or so to go to Six Flags. If you want to get extravagant at your summer protest you could invest in poster board and magic markers. Maybe buy a dozen eggs. And since you're not eating them you can get the cheap non-organic small eggs.

"That's great for the unemployed, Rachael. But what about those of us who still have a job, but are broke nonetheless? We don't have the time off to go down to Citicorp and disallow those bastards from working. We're too busy staying late at our jobs and not getting overtime."

I hear you. Well, simple enough. Enjoy you're summer nights going to bars that have outdoor seating a begin to villify the profession of investment banker. For years we've kept our disdain for professions such as IRS auditor (but who is making enough to pay taxes anymore) or Actors. Granted actors are pretty self-involved and many are little nuts, but actors are pretty helpful people. They take your food orders, mix your drinks, bring your luggage up to your hotel room. Instead of shunning the actor the the IRS guy shun an investment banker every chance you get. While you're drinking your PBR at the outside bar start telling Polish jokes, but replace the word "Polish" for "investment banker" or "sociopath CEO."

It would go something like this, "Did you hear about the Investment Banker flashlight? It's solar powered." Or "How do you get a one armed Bank CEO out of a tree? Throw rocks at him until he's unconcious and falls."

Enjoy the rest of your summer.

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