It's Not That I Don't Want to Share, But You Make it so Hard

The following is a true, very true, dialogue between myself and my 22-year old roommate.

Roommate: Can I borrow your car?
ME: Where are you going?
Roommate: Upstate New York.
ME: Where Upstate?
Roommate: I don't know. Somewhere up there.
ME: You don't know how far outside the city?
Roommate: Nah.
ME: Uh well, do you drive stick?
Roommate: Of course. I learned once. I had trouble with reverse, but I can do it now. Anyway we'll be going forward so I won't need reverse.
ME: Uh. When do you need the car?
Roommate: July 4th.
ME: Oh sorry I have to go to bbq in Connecticut on the 5th.
Roommate: I'll have it back by then.
ME: Uhh.
Roommate: Your car fits 7 right?
ME: No. It seats four, maybe five. if you all are short and skinny.
Roommate: Some people will sit on laps. Oh. And if you have a permit all you need is a liscenced driver right.
ME: The liscenced driver has to have had their liscence for three years. Wait! You don't have a liscence?
Roommate: No.
ME: You know, I'm going to say that you can't borrow my car, which isn't really mine anyway. No. No you can't. If you did and anything happened I'd tell the cops you stole my car. Yeah, so. No. Maybe you all should just rent a car.
Roommate: How much do you think that's going to be?
ME: I don't really know. I'm going to say cheaper than fixing mine after you total it driving in reverse in some yet to be determined town somewhere in the State of New York.
Rooommate: Hmmm. Really? Come on.
ME: I got to go to bed.