Monday, July 16, 2007

The Irrational Thoughts of an Insomniac

I have great difficulty falling asleep each night. I believe that someone is going to kill me in my sleep. Not a specific someone just a someone. It could be someone I know or could be someone I don't know, but it's a person or even persons and they will kill me in my bed while I sleep.

My first line of defense is to stay awake. I lie in bed and stare at my closed bedroom door. Murderers do not kill awake people. No one wants to tussle with an awake person. Sleeping people rarely tussle unless of course they are night tusslers (it's similar to night walkers or eaters but they tussle instead of eating to walking). When my will begins to weaken and my eyes begin to droop I have to go to my second line of defense--my nightstand lamp. I turn the lamp on. It's common knowledge that murderers have vision similar to raccoons and only can see in the dark. Keeping the light on blinds the-would-be assailants. Then I sleep restlessly. I wake up every hour from 2am-6am when the sun comes up. Then I turn off my light and sleep soundly until my alarm goes off at 7:40am. Yes, once the sun comes up I know I'm safe because murderers don't murderer people during the day even if their-would-be victim is sleeping and not tussling.

Since I began this temp job in May I've been exhausted, so I've been taking naps in Central Park during my lunch break. I feel it's good for me to get back to my European roots and incorporate the siesta into my daily routine. What I find interesting is that I seem to have no problem falling asleep in the park. In my bedroom behind my bedroom door located in my apartment which has a steel door with a dead-bolt lock, which is located in a building made of brick and wood which is fortified with a heavy gated door I can not sleep do to fear. But out in the open surrounded by strangers I sleep like I'm on a valium vodka martini.

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