I'm a Little Late
Put the hanger down. I'm not late in that way. I'm just a little behind in my commenting on the news. A few days ago or a week, whatever, a constitutional amendment banning same sex marriage did not pass.
It's a goddamn travesty. We haven't even begun the campaign to ban the use of coal and now this defeat. I know. You are wondering what banning coal and same sex marriage have in common. First off, they're both bans, so they have that in common. Secondly, they both cause cancer. If you don't know-- semen carries the Human Paplova Virus, otherwise referred to as HPV. HPV causes cervical cancer. If two men have sex that doubles the semen flow doubling the chance to spread HPV thereby causing a whole generation of men to develop cervical cancer. Just like coal. Right before they cave in coal mining tunnels causing “breaking news” which interrupts our favorite soap. Inciting me to shout at the television, "What is this shit? A rescue? What about Philip and Beth? Are they getting back together or not? Those miners have 2 days of oxygen left, but this could be the end for my young lovers." I'm then forced to pop in a "Sex and the City" DVD just to get through my morning. This is all succeeds the coal industry strip mining mountains and killing little bunnies and Bambi - not the stripper the deer. Then 'they' burn the coal, you all inhale it like you inhaled glue in the 70s, you get high like some God damn hippie, and you start protesting gay marriage bans. You exclaim, gay people have the right to get cervical cancer. The more you shout the more coal you inhale; the more intoxicated you become; the more cysts grow in your lungs; forming lung cancer, but that’s not before you breed some deformed children.
Are you friggin, beatnik cancer-lovers happy? Why don't you go smoke bowl of coal with your activist judges. That'll keep you're motor running. You make me sick.
It's a goddamn travesty. We haven't even begun the campaign to ban the use of coal and now this defeat. I know. You are wondering what banning coal and same sex marriage have in common. First off, they're both bans, so they have that in common. Secondly, they both cause cancer. If you don't know-- semen carries the Human Paplova Virus, otherwise referred to as HPV. HPV causes cervical cancer. If two men have sex that doubles the semen flow doubling the chance to spread HPV thereby causing a whole generation of men to develop cervical cancer. Just like coal. Right before they cave in coal mining tunnels causing “breaking news” which interrupts our favorite soap. Inciting me to shout at the television, "What is this shit? A rescue? What about Philip and Beth? Are they getting back together or not? Those miners have 2 days of oxygen left, but this could be the end for my young lovers." I'm then forced to pop in a "Sex and the City" DVD just to get through my morning. This is all succeeds the coal industry strip mining mountains and killing little bunnies and Bambi - not the stripper the deer. Then 'they' burn the coal, you all inhale it like you inhaled glue in the 70s, you get high like some God damn hippie, and you start protesting gay marriage bans. You exclaim, gay people have the right to get cervical cancer. The more you shout the more coal you inhale; the more intoxicated you become; the more cysts grow in your lungs; forming lung cancer, but that’s not before you breed some deformed children.
Are you friggin, beatnik cancer-lovers happy? Why don't you go smoke bowl of coal with your activist judges. That'll keep you're motor running. You make me sick.
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