Greeting Cards. They Could be Happier

A friend of mine came out of "the closet" recently. Another friend, Claire, sent an email to our recently openly gay friend. The email was not well recieved. She meant to be supportive and happy for our friend, but alas he took it as glib and unfeeling. I felt for Claire. I don't think it's her fault. I blame Hallmark. The really need to make "So, now your gay" cards. And even if they're insensitive like, "Congrats on sucking dick!" you can say, "That was the only card they had at the store."

They could make cards like, "You're Gay! Of course we still love you we always thought you were gay when you were telling us you were straight."

Or gift cards: "Today you are a gay. Congratulations!" An then they provide the little flap for you to stash the check.

Fake Gift Cards: "I would have put a check in here, but then I realized you're going to be living a double income life with no kids. "

"So you say you're a homosexual. I think that's gayrific."