I Have Only One New Year's Resolution

pictured above Charles Star, Saints Fan.

1. Find friends who root for the same sports teams I do. I'd like to avoid being mocked the whole care ride home when my team looses. I find it quite distracting as I'm trying to drive these people home from the game.
1A. If I don't find new friends make sure to buy Giants and Yankees jersies to wear at games I attend. Even though they are hideous. I don't appreciate the the other stadium people associating me with a team I do not like just because I seem to be in a couple. Women can vote now and pick their own sports teams.
1aI. Have sex before purchasing above jersies. Once worn I'm sure to never be touched again.
1B. Stop going to sporting events with only one other person who is male.
1B exception. If said male is hot and wants to have sex with me. Especially if said male wants to have sex with me despite my wearing a vile sports jersey.
1B exception 2. If the said male is my boyfriend Jack-- who better still have sex with me if I buy and wear a sports jersey.