I Should Be in Bed

This past weekend I saw the trailer for the new Patrick Dempsey vehichle, "Made of Honor." (Do you see how clever hollywood is to use some word play with "made." I would have just misspelled it.)

The trailer really upset me because it has ripped my life off. As many of you know I have been planning to have my very good friend (some might say my best friend) Jesse, who is a male, be my best man at my wedding when I marry James. At first James protested this idea because he wanted to choose his own best man. James acquiessed once I explained that he would choose his own best man, but since my best friend was a boy I too would have to have a best man. I unlike hollywood was not going to emasculate my friend by making him my maid of honor. I leave my emasculating to the boys I date.

Regardless of what I call Jesse at my wedding it's basically the same premise for what is bound to be a smash hit this spring. I can't believe all these people are going to get rich off my life. It's my life to a tee. The only exception is that James, my husband to be wouldn't care if I had sex wth my best friend. You see James and I aren't dating we're just engaged. But whether or not James cares or not is moot because Jesse and I do not find each other remotely attractive. And then of course, if I left for the U.K. for six weeks my best friend wouldn't even notice, never mind miss me and realize he is utterly in love with me and can't live without me. Further Jesse would never get any of his maid of honor/bridal best man duties accomplished and I have to do it myself making my wedding that more stressful. Because in real life you take what you can get when it comes to friends and husbands.

But other than those few exceptions this movie is exactly my life. It's bullshit that Hollywood has stolen my life and will now make a bundle and I'll still be living below the poverty line owing taxes.


J.L. said…
Hey now, what about me being the official Jesse Minder??? I would get shit done! Can't believe they stole your life!