Israel and Palestine aint nothing

Interesting turn of events regarding the remaining items of my summer wardrobe. (for back story please see the "Viva La Resistance" and "Pair of Pants" postings) Yesterday, I was supposed to meet with my parents in a Father's Day summit. Supposedly, the few items that my parents still posessed of mine were to be returned and if those things couldn't be returned there was talk of the items being replaced. I called the Parenta Embassy-- temporarily located in Boonton, NJ while construction continues on the new Embassy in Boonton Township. They received my call with civility. However, when I mentioned that I'd be coming over for Father's Day later that day with a ceremonial card to present to my father and discuss this clothing conflict, talks broke down. The Parents all of sudden became unavailable. They had a great deal of "running around" to do. Is my father really in that much denial that he is actually a father that he can't even take a card from his only child.

They continued to mention a possible peace treaty, the terms of which included my ceasing and desisting of posting crude, blog entries regarding my sex life with derelicts (see thursdays post) in exchange they would take me shopping to replace clothing items they lost. First off, why should they be embarassed about my postings. They aren't the ones who had a crush on a blackened tooth unemployed, forty year old "actor." That was me. That's my shame. They can't steal that from me as well. Secondly, they lost my clothes. I put my clothes in their charge and now some have gone missing. They should simply return or replace said items without me having to compromise my art. And that's right dick jokes are art an form. Thirdly, they know I'll never go shopping in order to replace items. Not only because I loathe shopping, but because who has time to go shopping with my mother? She's insane. The woman can not get our of Marshalls in under three hours and that's just one store. As I have mentioned before I have my life to screw up and can't be held up with marathon shopping sessions in order to replace four items of clothing.

So tonight, I plan on calling an emergency summit meeting at their house. This way I can return the car, do some laundry and maybe pick up some groceries. God they really are so ungiving.