Public Service Announcement
The following post has no intention of being funny. I just feel a strong desire to inform the public about friendship. This week I have had two separate conversations regarding friendship. It seems that people don't know what makes a friend. So for the benefit of humanity I'm going to post the four guideposts in determining if someone you know is a friend. I came up with these guideposts 7 years ago, but I think it still holds true today.
1. You have a strong desire to share the events of your life with the other person. Something good happens you want to celebrate. Something bad happens you want to be consoled. You feel comfortable divulging your secrets to the other person.
2. You want to know about the other person's life. You want them to share their tragedies and victories with you. If you find out they have gotten engaged through a third party you'd be hurt that they didn't tell you. You have a genuine curiosity about what they are doing with their days.
3. You create memories. You socialize. You go on vacation or to the movies or to a bar together. Whatever it is you spend time together and make plans to do so.
4. You reminisce about the memories you've created together. You also reminisce about the events you weren't there for but heard about and vice versa.
All four must be present otherwise you're not friends. That doesn't mean you don't have a great affinity for the other person, but you are not friends. If all you do is reminisce you might have once been friends, but probably aren't any more. Back in college I never thought that love would have to be a signpost of friendship. I thought that was a given. But I guess we can put it down as number 5-- you have to be in love with that person and they love you back.
There is no such thing as just friends. There is just dating, just neighbors, just colleagues, just peers but there is nothing slight about friendship. About this subject I am dead serious.
Tomorrow (or next week-- as I go to New England this weekend to tell jokes and look at foliage) I'll have a horrific and hopefully funny sex story.
1. You have a strong desire to share the events of your life with the other person. Something good happens you want to celebrate. Something bad happens you want to be consoled. You feel comfortable divulging your secrets to the other person.
2. You want to know about the other person's life. You want them to share their tragedies and victories with you. If you find out they have gotten engaged through a third party you'd be hurt that they didn't tell you. You have a genuine curiosity about what they are doing with their days.
3. You create memories. You socialize. You go on vacation or to the movies or to a bar together. Whatever it is you spend time together and make plans to do so.
4. You reminisce about the memories you've created together. You also reminisce about the events you weren't there for but heard about and vice versa.
All four must be present otherwise you're not friends. That doesn't mean you don't have a great affinity for the other person, but you are not friends. If all you do is reminisce you might have once been friends, but probably aren't any more. Back in college I never thought that love would have to be a signpost of friendship. I thought that was a given. But I guess we can put it down as number 5-- you have to be in love with that person and they love you back.
There is no such thing as just friends. There is just dating, just neighbors, just colleagues, just peers but there is nothing slight about friendship. About this subject I am dead serious.
Tomorrow (or next week-- as I go to New England this weekend to tell jokes and look at foliage) I'll have a horrific and hopefully funny sex story.
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